Humor and Parody

Generic Disclaimer for an Imaginary Publication

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Environmental Impact
This document was printed on paper hand-crafted from recycled bus transfers. The ink was prepared from natural vegetable dyes derived from plants that were not plucked but which fell harmlessly to thick organic Burmuda grass and lovingly carried by Carmelite Sisters directly to Crystal City, Virginia in a 2007 Toyota Yaris hatchback in complete silence and non-denomenational prayer and contemplation. This cruelty-free process did not involve any obvious, apparent, or imagined harm to any plants or large animals. No foul language or pornographic or Pre-Raphaelite images were used during the process. It is placenta-free, unscented, biodegradable, and Y2K compliant. …

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Movies

Good Movies: Elegy

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Elegy (2008) might be considered a disturbing view of men, written from a woman’s perspective.  If so, it is a fairly kind, if frank, perspective.  The movie has a remarkably un-judgmental stance.  This movie made me look up and reserve other films by director Isabel Coixet.  Unfortunately they are few in number. …

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Movies

Good Movies: Bobby

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It’s a mistake to say that Bobby (2006 and 111 mins) is a movie about the assassination of Robert Kennedy.  Obviously it includes that, but it is really about America in the 1960’s.  It’s about race and Vietnam and violence and drugs, but it also is about people trying to get along in life in ways that have nothing to do with any decade.  It features a surprisingly effective blending of archival news footage and switching back and forth–as in Forest Gump only better done. …

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Humanity Stories

A Woman’s Body

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If I could, I would slide out of bed and into the pool.  Every morning at six.  Then the laps.  Thirty six to the mile, half an hour in the cooling flow of water, counting down the distance.

My left hand is getting better all the time.  It used to start the pull too soon.  The timing now is smooth and the stoke constant.  It has taken years of daily swimming to accomplish this. …

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Humanity Stories

Claiming the Leftovers

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I learn about life from naked men in the swimming pool locker room in the morning before work.  One pool I go to has a lot of older guys, mostly retired.  They talk about things the doctor told them, reasons their children are getting divorced, what their wives want them to do when they get home, or what somebody ought to do about the country.  I was half listening as one guy told about taking the family to a restaurant for dinner.  Until he quoted what the little girl said out loud at the table: …

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